Well, here I sit with less than a couple of weeks until the Modo Spring Run-Off 8k. Races sure do have a funny way of sneaking up on you! Until now, I hadn’t been feeling all that stressed about this particular one. I’ll slip out of the house quietly in the morning, go for a little run around Stanley Park & get home just as my wife finishes brewing a fresh pot of coffee, making some homemade scones and is ready (with sincere enthusiasm) to massage my sweaty feet. It has the makings to be a nice little Sunday around the Chilibeck household.
I remember having similar feelings (foot massage included) leading up to my first shorter-distanced race back in November. That 5km may not have been as long as a half marathon (duh) but I came away from that race with a newfound respect, passion & fear of the competitive shorter courses. They are a total head game. A calculated adrenaline rush where pace & stamina are critical to a successful finish. I loved and hated every single second of it…okay, I hated every second of it but the after party was pretty enjoyable. As soon as I finished, I immediately began thinking of what I could do to improve on my time for the next race. I was hooked.
So as we inch inevitably closer to the March 22nd starting gun, my main goal is (as always) to have some genuine fun on the course but also put up a time that my family won’t be embarrassed of. Just to make sure that my focus doesn’t wane over the next couple of weeks, I thought it would be best to light a fire under my butt & place a couple of wagers on the outcome. Who bets on running though? Who would be a worthy adversary? I made a smooth bet with one of the other Digital Champions that the loser buys the winner a growler of beer (FYI…you’re going down Alison!). Still, the fire wasn’t quite raring…
To my surprise, the answer came pretty darn quickly. Since this is one of my very first times racing in an 8K event, the only reference I had for this distance was from my senior year of High School. Each year, the Grade 12 class of Paul Kane High School (Go Blues!) would finish their Phys Ed term by running a couple of 4km circuits around an area of town known as Forest Lawn. It was called The Amazon Run and it was a pretty big deal for us back then. Throughout the term we’d spend a lot of our classes talking trash, placing farmers bets & secretly hoping that you wouldn’t finish last out of your friends. Fast-forward a couple of decades and it’s actually mindboggling how often I think about the Amazon Run while out training. I am always looking at my watch & calculating how fast that would be in “Amazon Time”. Would I come anywhere close to matching the times put up by some of the XC Team at our school? Heck no…give your head a shake man. Would it put me in the range of some of the greasy Hockey Guys? Still no…but getting closer. Please tell me I could at least beat my old self. BINGO! I’m going to beat High School Ryan. Nay, destroy him.
To completely understand my mounting motivation, let me bend your ear about 17-year-old Ryan. I wouldn’t describe him as arrogant…maybe complacently confident is a better portrayal. He was a decent enough athlete but carried with him a frequently questioned work ethic. Even though he was technically on his school track team, it was basically just a way to scam a day off from sitting in a classroom. I think he did the triple jump or something but he was certainly NOT a runner. He preferred to play supporting roles on as many teams as possible & by doing so, tricked school faculty into crowning him the Top Athlete at his school of around 1000 students. He actually absolutely duped them. Throw the guy on a basketball or volleyball court and he certainly wouldn’t be the worst player out there; heck, he might even surprise you a couple of times. Put the guy in some running shoes and all bets were off. He was mentally weak child with a very short attention span (plus terrible fashion sense & even worse hair…but now I’m just being petty). If the odd High School babe didn’t show up to watch extracurricular sports then he probably would have focused on his studies a bit more and made a grown-up career choice…like becoming an accountant or dental hygienist or currency trader.
The Competition:
To get this bet rolling, I decided to do some digging around on the Internet for official results from the 1997 Amazon Run; surprisingly, someone didn’t create a website to track our times back then. Come to think of it, I’m not entirely sure the World Wide Web had been invented quite yet. Anyways, off the top of my head I remember being clocked somewhere in the 38-40 minute range on that particular day. I was a little slower than the athletic skinny kids but a tad quicker than any of the Props from our Senior Rugby team. This is pretty much what you would expect from a lazy jock with a weekend of Big Bears & making mixed tapes on his mind.
Since I am not 100% sure of my time in 1997, I am going to cut it down the middle and post 17-year-old Ryan with a 39 minute chip time. Since he probably got distracted by one of the cool girls on the run, I am going to spot that mushroom-cut, little twerp a 1-minute head start. Thanks to my passing grade in Math 30, that means I have to run the Modo8K in 00:37:59 or less in order to beat High School Ryan. No problems, right? This would mean running at a pace of 4:45/km over that distance…certainly not impossible but definitely challenging given my current huskiness, creaky knees & everlasting addiction to ice cream. Has the making for a good battle!
The Wager:
Oh jeez, this is difficult since I am literally betting against someone that doesn’t currently exist, was extremely unemployed at the time & also harbouring an unhealthy butterscotch pudding diet. He had no money & no worldly possessions other than his collection of patterned rayon shirts & SLAM magazines. Either way, here’s how it’s going to play out:
If I lose to 17-year-old Ryan then I agree to smarten up, lay off the beers (a bit) & focus wholeheartedly on beating my PB time from last year’s Scotia Half-Marathon. I also agree to quit stalling and immediately sign up for my first full marathon & finish it before the end of the year. Ugh. My poor knees…
If I beat 17-year-old Ryan then he agrees to let me sell all his old hockey cards & invest that money into a nice pair of running shoes for my daughter when she turns 17…in 2031. I’m sure her school will have some sort of year end race & instead of slogging it out in a pair of beasts, she’ll be laced up in the spiciest kicks on the market. She’ll be unstoppable (unless of course she gets her Mum’s athletic genes…then we will just encourage her to have fun in her fancy new shoes).
It’s officially ON!
So, how am I going to train for this race & ensure victory? To be honest, I probably won’t do anything out of the ordinary. I’m feeling half decent these days and I try to not focus too much on race preparation. I run to keep my mind healthy, see different parts of the world & burn the pizza cheese off my belly region. That said, one thing that 35-year-old Ryan does not lack is distaste for failure. I don’t like losing, plain and simple. Once the race starts & my perfectly crafted playlist kicks in, it’s all business. If you want to know how I did (and you just can’t wait for the posted results), look for me in the Beer Garden…I’ll be the one with the big smile, bad hair & the poor fashion sense. I may have become a runner somewhere along the way but unfortunately some things will never change. See you at the finish line, kid.
About Ryan
Oh hey there! My name is Ryan and I like to run! Birthed and raised in Alberta, I am now lucky enough to live, work & run in beautiful Vancouver, BC. While training for the Scotiabank Vancouver Half-Marathon back in 2014, I got a little tired of plugging in my earphones and hitting the pavement on my own. I thought to myself: “Self, running has to be more fun than this”. The next day I rounded up a few people and started the East Vancouver Run Crew. Our goal is (and will always be) to provide everyone with a pressure-free, questionably organized and socially driven environment where runners of all abilities could come together to meet, chat, do a little running and a little more chatting. Through this energetic (and growing) community we’ve built, we’re making some new friends, pushing each other to go on adventures and continually adding some activity into our daily lives. I’m pretty excited to see where we can take this.
Connect with Ryan:
Twitter: @meatysauce and @EastVanRunCrew
Instagram: @ryanmeatysauce and @EastVanRunCrew